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If happiness is a chocolate bar, I’m your dietician

7 Jan
“You should never doubt what no one is sure about.” -Willy Wonka 

happy flowchart

Happiness Flowchart compliments of unknown tumblr follower

An Analysis of Happiness from a Psychological Viewpoint  People crave happiness as much as they expect happiness.  They do strange things to try to achieve it and more often than not, naively looking to other people to find it.  The stakes for achieving happiness are high.  And here in lies the eternal flaw of expectations: in having expectations, we forget that the greatest, most heart-warming happiness, comes from having no expectations at all.  Happiness is immensely personal and priceless in value. Happiness is complicated, it’s fleeting.  Expecting this complex emotion persistently from another is not only an unnecessary burden on the giver, but also creates a growing, listless agitation within the self.  This expectation evolves into a dependency, followed by an umbilical chord of sorts, and peaks with a paranoia that can only be soothed by someone.   This dependency on happiness creates disappointment in the giver when this happiness is not received.  A feeling of abandonment washes over them, when the emotion is not dispensed. Floods their being, and when you’re drowning, “you grab the first board you see.” Too many people try to fill the void this way instead of filling the void with something, they themselves, can control.  This drives them wild, often placing them in situations of anger, confusion, impatience, hostility, and ultimately: sadness.  Perhaps we all need something to control, but it is a sad misconception to seek this control (often accompanied by power) through another human being, for it is really only our own lives that we can control. So I guess my suggestion or answer to this contemplation, is to fill that void with a passion, an interest, something that surpasses the limited time frame of life, and seek in others intellect, guidance and assistance as you cultivate your dream. Companions are merely there to reveal the things that our minds may have casually overlooked.  To loosen the knots of our own tangled thoughts.  Only feel curiosity toward others, never attachment or fear. “Take with you only those who are going to lift you higher” in the pursuit of your passion.

Originally appeared on January 31, 2007